The national theme for the Men and Young Men’s Alliance (COGOP Men’s Ministry) is “Aspiring Towards a Job-like Engagement.” The Old Testament character Job was certainly a good man engaged with his family, faith and community. However, like everyone, he collided with a series of life events that significantly marred his path.
Engagement doesn’t mean that you are perfectly qualified to influence a person’s life, but rather, you may be what that individual needs at that time.
I lost connection with my cousin Derrick McFarlane over the years, but I’ve never lost the wonder and awe I felt when my superhero-like cousin came to visit us in Oshawa, Ontario Canada.
I may have been 10 or 11 years old. Regardless, he was nothing short of a big brother -seeing I had the privilege of growing up with three older sisters.
He was an air force mechanic, and of course in any boy’s eyes, that was just awesome! In fact, Derrick inspired a love for fighter planes and he got me a huge book on F14 Tomcats.
Furthermore, despite the unfortunate reality that our old house on Eulalie Avenue unforgivingly triggered his allergies, he still regularly came to visit. Go figure…
The power of engagement is that it has the potential to leave a memorable timestamp on life. When I reminisce about my cousin, some obscure things come to mind like his love for tomatoes -which my parents grew in our backyard. Also, one day he randomly told me not to drink beer. (Honestly, I didn’t even know what that was, but good advice nonetheless.)
One time, being so convinced that Alaska was a part of Canada, without criticism, he graciously showed me a map of North America and said, “See for yourself.” He didn’t argue, and never made me feel dumb. (In my defence, I was young…)
Although I did not see much of him when I got older, he continued to leave memorable timestamps. I remember his generous spirit. When I got married in 1998 he unexpectedly sent me a laptop as a wedding gift. That was a big deal!
I heard that for a while he was ill, and it seemed like his path was complicated, but I wasn’t familiar with much of the story. Life can be tough, and at times all we can do as humans is find some good memories and hold onto them dearly. What else can we do? We can’t move back in time, we have no guarantees for the future, we can just do the best we can with the gift of the present.
Derrick was a part of my boyhood life, and he will be missed. I take the time to recognize and honour the memories he has given me. I send deepest and heartfelt condolences and love to his precious family and my dear Aunt Monica.
Goodbye Cuz.
The Genesis Man Project 