What’s a “Ceremony”?
How can you help young men to understand who they are and move towards a community of manhood? One such way is through rites of passages and youth “ceremonies”. Rites of passages are more important than we think and ceremonies are not just for weddings.
What kind of ceremony am I talking about? This was something that grew out of the Genesis Man ministry. It is a (casually dressed) formal event where men and peers of a young man meet, recognize and acknowledge his manhood and maturity. It is an opportunity where significant males in a young man’s life come together to challenge and encourage him.
Note: When we did our very first ceremony, it was for a young man in a single parent family. We allowed his mother to attend but she was in another space as an observer.
When is the best time to plan a ceremony? It depends again on the need and circumstances of the young man. Our men’s group had ceremonies with candidates ranging from 13 years old to young men in their late 20’s. Significant junctions in a male’s life are also ideal, such as: puberty, high school graduation, beginning of post-secondary, before marriage, and the birth of a first child.
My Son’s Ceremonies
I have had two ceremonies for my son Joshua. The first was done when he turned 13. Below was his challenge he had to present to the group…
Joshua’s Ceremony Challenge
Congratulations Joshua for agreeing to participate in this special ceremony. Please accept this opportunity as a stepping stone in the journey of your manhood. Receive the encouragement, advice and affirmation to be offered by the influential men in your life and close peers.
For your challenge you must present a speech that will highlight in an effective way three important lessons you have learned this far in your life in regards to the area of the physical, spiritual and mental. Provide examples if possible. Also, share with us your dream for the future. Your presentation should be approximate time 4 – 7 minutes.
Excerpt from Joshua’s Ceremony Challenge Letter
The Gift of Significance that I gave him was a portion of my journal which I kept during university. I figured that he could see who I was and what kind of issues I was facing at the time. Joshua’s ceremony was attended by a couple of his close friends and other significant men in his life. (I was also touched that his soccer coach had made the sacrifice to be there.)
Note: One thing I learned throughout the process of these events was how willing men were to participate in the life of another young man. No one ever flatly refused to attend, and if they couldn’t they sent letters to read or appeared via social media.
The second ceremony was the summer after he graduated from high school. His challenge was to memorize and recite as much of Proverbs 3 (as he could) and present it to the group. My reason for choosing this challenge was because of the nature and content of this important passage. Memorizing this would put this Word in his heart and speak to him especially since my voice would be much further away…
I was so proud of him. He recited quite a bit of it. When he got stuck and I offered to help him, he refused and persevered through.
(See below for pictures of this ceremony)
My ceremony gift (which normally should have a high emotional rather than financial significance) was a Lego Technic Porsche. Our family had a long history of Lego nights growing up and with him going away to University, I wanted to give a very meaningful project that could occupy his mind, especially when times would get tough.
How did that effect his identity? I could give you my opinion, but I’ve asked him to speak for himself.
Photo Gallery
(Joshua’s 2nd Ceremony)
(Joshua is third from the left at the front of the group photo. I’m in the back row just to the left of him and also standing up in the third picture from the end.)
Reflections on my Ceremonies – Joshua Harriott
I have had the opportunity to have two ceremonies of my own; both were a great unique experience that I will cherish for the rest of my life. Being around a bunch of friends and male mentors encouraging and sharing their life experiences in a tight-knit gathering was special and uplifting. Here are some moments of my ceremony that I will share.
On both occasions I received a challenge that I had to present during my ceremony. For my second ceremony I was challenged to memorize Proverbs 3 and present as much as I could in front of the group of guys. Not only did this challenge stretch me ability but it also made me reflect on my past and helped guide the steps of my future through sitting down and really memorizing the words of the Lord. As to this day the verses that I memorized help guide me through life.
The gift of significance was another memorable part of my ceremonies, as to this day the gifts I had received have had lasting impacts on my life to this today. The most memorable one would be the team Canada captains soccer armband that I received from Bro. James during my first ceremony. Although it was a neat gift on the surface, the significance behind the gift was greater. Essentially, the captain armband represents as a reminder to always take command of my situations as a captain of a soccer team would, however not by my own strength but by my coach, the ultimate coach which is Jesus. As he will lead me in the proper direction in all that I do.
Overall, my two ceremonies were great experiences, and I surely encourage other young men to participate in ones of their own.
August 5, 2020
Further Discussion…
By the way, what does Alien vs Predator movie have to do with ceremony? There is a surpising connection…
Israel Harriott
(Would you like to plan a Ceremony? – Click on page 2…)
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